Quick! Catch it while you can...

It seems fitting that a light bulb went off while I was standing at the kitchen sink, washing dishes. It was, quite literally, a cleansing experience. I was listening to my favorite winter piano CD, enjoying the peacefulness of my empty house, when it hit me that 2009 is going to be the year I live up to my own expectations rather than others' (or my perception of others'). I thought, "I have to write this down before I lose it!" I felt like a teenager running to take an important phone call as I bounded up the stairs to my newly-relocated office to plop down at the computer. Despite being out of breath I managed to at least get a few things out so I could finish later.

I do not like to use the term "resolution" because it seems as though I am setting myself up for failure, so I decided to create a list of things I would like to achieve. Here are some that were top of mind:

• Play more piano
• Pay more attention to my instincts
  
• Be the best person I can be in all areas of my life: disciple, citizen, daughter, sister, wife, mother, teacher, friend, employee (not necessarily in that order), even if it means not always getting my own way
• Surround myself with people who embrace new experiences and from whom I can learn new things
  
• Completely unsubscribe to "the grass is always greener" theory
  
• Consume less, use less (energy, for instance)
  
• Eat more miso!
• Walk in the rain
• Spend more time outside
• Go skydiving
  
• Engage in more random acts of kindness
• Speak the truth
  
• Volunteer as a family
  
• Love unconditionally, even when it hurts
  
• Worry less about things that are out of my control
  

I really don't want to re-hash the past year, and I don't think you want me to either, so I will simply say that I learned a lot from my experiences in 2008. Some lessons were painful, others were joyful, and yet others had aspects of both. I met a lot of new and interesting people and I feel fortunate to have the opportunity to spend time this year nurturing relationships with a handful of them. My family is completely enmeshed in the community after living here for only a year and a half. People here are genuinely nice. My children are thriving. I have a job, a roof over my head and a wonderful family. For all of these things I am desperately grateful.

I firmly believe that there is a time and place for everything, that there is a reason for all that happens. For instance, twice in the span of as many months last fall, I came out on the other side of a friendship that went terribly awry--to either form or strengthen a bond with someone linked to the situation. My initial reaction was, "Whoa, how ironic," but the more I thought about it, the stronger I felt that, perhaps, despite the breakdown of the initial friendship, the result was as it was meant to be. We make our choices but the universe rights itself when we send it spinning by choosing incorrectly. Huh. Who knew?

Sudden inspiration rocks.